Thursday, 8 March 2012

Letter to a Woman


First let me tell you how passionate I am about you, how much you inspire me, how much I admire your beauty, your intelligence but above all your common sense. I adore that you're practical, that you're a do-er, that no matter what the situation, you're always willing to roll up your sleeves and get on with it. 

I find you stunning in every way imaginable. You may not realise it because you've gained a few pounds, or you've lost your washboard stomach because of the c-section or simply that damn post 30 metabolism, but you're gorgeous, stretch marks and all. The extra pounds are proof that you've lived, you've loved, you've experienced. If you ever forget that make a note of what you did from puberty to now, you'll see why its okay to no longer look like your 16 year old self - these scars are proof that you've fought hard in the battle of life and that you've won. It's no cliche that you get better with time, but not because you work out more or wear more make up but because you've learnt a lot, you've grown wiser, and you now realise how incredibly smart and amazingly gorgeous you are. It's that knowledge and the confidence that comes with it that makes you so alluring.

I know the past year hasn't been easy for you, that you've had to deal with your fair share of adversities but you did it, you dealt with them and you pulled through. I recognise that you're bruised from the lost love, the broken heart, the loss of a best friend, the missed job opportunity and countless other situations that left you feeling a little down-trodden. I want to remind you that the knocks in life are what make you stronger. You've picked yourself up, dusted yourself off, learned yet another lesson and kept on walking. So with each emotional and physical scar, you've become a better version of yourself and that, beautiful lady is no small feat. So what if you didn't see the heartache coming, you let down you guard, you trusted too much, you didn't sell yourself enough at the interview? So what if you made a decision to end a failing business you'd put all your energy into, or left a financially secure job for an uncertain dream? These are simply examples of you living. Taking risks is a part of who you are and if you stopped doing that, then what would be the point of life?

I know that you sometimes forget how much you have to be proud of,  but you should never underestimate how much you do and how many lives you affect. You may never develop the confidence that seems to come so naturally to the opposite sex, I call it blind confidence. That's okay. A little humility goes a long way. Don't forget to remind yourself as often as possible that you can do whatever you set your mind to. You can love again, work again, start something new. Every day is an opportunity for you to reinvent yourself. If you feel defeated, it should be for a fleeting moment only. If you need to be reminded of how capable you are, take a look around at some of the people who've achieved so much, you will see that many of them are simply opportunists, who had so much self-belief that they convinced the rest of us of their greatness. Their real life stories minus the PR spin should remind you that you are just as capable of doing what they've done and more. If you need to be reminded, call me - and I will tell you why I find you so utterly fabulous....when I think about how far you've come, what you've done, when I think about the moments you doubted yourself, thought you'd never be happy alone or without a baby or a career. I marvel at how easy you make it all look.You've defined what happiness means on your own terms. Continue to ignore those who try to put you down, the countless experts who tell you your happiness is dependent on a man or a child or a position on a board of directors. Keep on doing what makes you happy, in whatever form that takes.

One final thing sweetie, surround yourself with people who make you happy, who root for you in this journey called life. It's important that you have friends, be they male or female who make the journey easier and more pleasant. I'm grateful to be one of those friends and look forward to more laughter, more awe and certainly lots more inspiration. 

With all my love,
Your friend

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